SUNDAY BLOG: YOU WON’T BELIEVE THIS!

TRUTH IS STRANGER THEN FICTION!

Manneken Pis  "Little man Pee"   a landmark small bronze sculpture in Brussels. Designed by Hiëronymus Duquesnoy the Elder
Manneken Pis “Little man Pee” a landmark small bronze sculpture in Brussels. Designed by Hiëronymus Duquesnoy the Elder

Stand up and be counted men.  A sensitive question – do you sit down or stand up when wishing to pass water! If you’re in Germany sitting down is the norm and taught from an early age but now a judge has ‘delivered a landmark ruling’ that men have the right to pee standing up.

Apparently little boys are taught to sit down and toilets in public places and offices often carry a sign suggesting that men do so. Those who sit are known as sitzpinklers, (sissies!)  Things changed within the last couple of weeks however when a landlord took a tenant to court for £1420 to repair the marble floor in the toilet and restore its sheen. You know the old saying: We aim to please, please aim too.  The motto being, stand up for your rights.

The Grand Opera House Belfast
The Grand Opera House Belfast

 

MORE AEROBIC THAN EXOTIC

Northern Ireland Opera production ‘Salome’

There was tension in the air at the Grand Opera House last Friday night as the dance of the Seven Veils drew close. It’s a pity that people were talking so much about the nude scene which turned out to be far from erotic with the dance itself being more aerobic! Cheap publicity.  Clever though to switch from a buxom Salome to a slim agile young woman who cartwheeled around Herod as he sat entranced.  Can’t imagine why.

This is a heavy opera, a Bible story rewritten by Oscar Wilde, set to music by Richard Struss with Oliver Mears producing and directing Northern Ireland Opera. This company has a high standard and the singing this year was the best I’ve heard from NI Opera and the casting very convincing. Modern dress, a Hacienda type low building with a huge picture window allowed us to look in on the guests at Herod’s birthday party as they watched the goings on outside.  Salome, (Giselle Allen) is an attractive young woman who has caught the eye of her step father Herod (Michael Colvin). If she dances for him he says he will grant her a wish, what ever she wants. She consults her mother Herodias (Heather Shipp), what should she ask for? Herodias has an axe to grind with Jokanaan, John the Baptist (Robert Hayward) who claims her marriage is unlawful. He had to be taught a lesson. why not ask for his head on a platter.

Giselle Allen as Salome
Giselle Allen as Salome

She gets her wish, but Salome regrets it and the final scene in this intense opera is bloody as the girl fondles and kisses the dead head and with the news from the Middle East, it’s hard to take.  Some people could not take it and left the theatre. The Ulster Orchestra were at their usual best but on occasions drowned out the singers although Michael Colvin managed to over come this. But the evening belonged to Giselle Allen who is both a convincing actress and an outstanding singer. I sat beside her friend who told me the singer was very nervous, it didn’t show.  The set, the costumes and the lighting all combined to make a memorable production, it’s a pity the public only had two chances to see it, the matinee this afternoon is the final chance to see this opera.

Coming up this week, “Death of a Comedian” at the Lyric and “50 Shades of Grey” at the Odyssey Cinema – at 10.30 in the morning.  What an exotic time to view the erotic!

 

COLD WEATHER ADVICE

Age NI is the leading charity for older people in Northern Ireland. Their motto will apply to most of us as time goes by: “Our vision is a world where everyone can love later life.” What is their advice these February days? Keeping the home warm and the bills as low as possible by setting the heating to 18-21°C or 64-70°F.    “With rising fuel costs, get financial support from us. There are grants, benefits and sources of advice available to make the home more energy efficient, improve heating or help with bills.”  The need to eat well is taken for granted but shopping might be a problem so help out where you can, hot meals and hot drinks are a vital source of energy to keep the body warm.

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If you can help in this way it won’t be necessary for the older person to go out in the cold and risk falling. This next thought applies to us all. “Draw your curtains, as soon as it gets dark to stop the heat escaping and the draughts coming in. Fit thermal linings to your curtains if you can – this will also help to keep the heat in. Keep windows and internal doors closed when it’s cold – this will keep heat inside, where you most need it. Get a keyhole cover – it should only cost a couple of pounds and will help keep the draughts out in cold weather.” Or get a piece of heavy cardboard and cellotape it across the keyhold. “Use a hot-water bottle, wheat bag or electric blanket to warm the bed, but never use a hot-water bottle and electric blanket together as this can be dangerous.” What you wear at this time of year is important. Advice is: “Wear several thin layers of clothing as these trap air and keep you warmer than one thick layer. Wear clothes made from wool, cotton or fleecy fabrics, if possible. Wear a hat and scarf – most heat is lost through the head and neck.” I know people who wear a hat and scarf in the house for extra heat, good idea.

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“If you older and are sitting for a while, a shawl or blanket will provide extra warmth. Also try to keep your feet up, because air is cooler at ground level. Wear warm clothes in bed. When it’s really cold, wear thermal underwear, bed socks and even a hat.” I agree with bed socks, wonderful source of comfort.
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Find out more about help you could get with heating costs, free home insulation and financial advice at Freephone 0808 808 7575 or www.ageuk.org.uk/northern-ireland.  If this doesn’t apply directly to you, perhaps it’s good advice for you to pass on to an elderly relative.

 

SILENT SUNDAYS

 

Murry and ODonnell power they way to a 26 to 3 win over Italy on Saturday.  Respect.
Tommy O’Donnell powers his  way to a 26 to 3 win over Italy on Saturday. Respect.

 

I remember standing by the touchline when my son was at primary school and playing rugby for the first time.  I was proud and attended quite a few of the games but I was sickened by the shouted comments by fathers, and some mothers.  On one occasion a man yelled: ‘Kill him’ to a little 10 year old going for a tackle.  I love the current international rugby games, well matched men, trained to within an inch of their lives, perhaps even over bulked up to remain healthy later in life.  But little boys and even secondary school pupils often are not physically matched and this can lead to dreadful injuries.  But it was the attitude of the grown men that I couldn’t believe.  Now I’m glad to read, some 30 years later, that a ban has been placed on touchline shouting in Yorkshire.  Apparently this was introduced in response to the pushy fathers screaming abuse at the referees and I’m sure the opposing team.  What are we doing to our young people?  Respect and tolerance can still be achieved even in a competitive situation, but what will the sons of the fathers be like when they are on the school touchline ‘cheering’ on their children’s team.

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STORY OF THE SNOW

I promised I’d tell you the story of the snow.  Here we go.

When God made the world he gave most things a colour except the snow. It was awful, when the flakes fell they were just transparent, people couldn’t see them, children couldn’t enjoy them, no one made snowmen.

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The snow was very unhappy. “If only I had a colour people would be able to see me.” What to do? There was one last rose of summer still blooming alone, it was red and beautiful. “Dear Rose,” said the Snow, “would you let me have some of your lovely redness so people could see red snow on the rooftops?” Rose was tired and ready to fall into a deep winter sleep. “No Snow, I will not, now go away, you’re cold.” Snow was disappointed.

Early in the spring some bluebells poked their heads up. “Oh Bluebells, would you let me have some of your lovely blueness so children could make lovely blue snowmen?” It was far too soon for the bluebells and they just wanted to retreat back into the warm earth for another month or so. They were moody. “No Snow, you can’t have any of our blueness, now go away.” Poor Snow.

A little primrose poked her head through the light covering of snow. “You look beautiful Primrose, could you spare me some of your yellowness, just think of the pathways and the banks covered in yellow snow.” The Primrose said “No” in a very snooty way and turned her delicate head away. What was the snow to do, no one wanted to help him.

Then he saw a little flower which was pure white, delicate and pretty. “Little flower you are so pretty, would you give me a little of your white colour so people will be able to see me fall from the sky and think I’m beautiful too?” “Certainly,” said the little flower, ”of course you can have some of my colour. Here, just scrape a little off my flower and take it for yourself. We will always be friends, in fact if you don’t mind I’d like to call myself Snowdrop.” How happy Snow was, he scrapped a little piece of white from the flower and suddenly the world could see the beauty of his flakes falling gently and silently to earth.

Snowdrops are coming.
Snowdrops are coming.

And if you go and look at a snowdrop, lift the little delicate head up and you’ll see little strips of green, that’s  where the snow lifted little pieces of white.

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552 Comments

  1. Says it all
    What a sad world we live in
    There are people being beheaded because of their beliefs. Sick people cant get treatment. People are killiing themselves because government withdraws the meagre amount they need to live on etc etc etc And someone fights for his right to urinate in a standing position

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